Thank You Justin Timberlake!

After separation or divorce there is a day when you have this sort of epiphany, you realize there is nothing else to go on and you have to move on, there is no other way than to move forward.  But what do you do with all the baggage from your old life? How do you decide what to keep and what to get rid off? And I am not even talking about your ex's belongings, I am talking about experiences, memories, places visited, and the never ending collection of moments you once shared with the one you thought was your forever after.

I was very lucky in this department.  When my ex left we were at this new home for about two years, and the house was about to go under a major renovation.  My life in a sense mirrored the house I was in.  Out with the old, in with the new.  I got the chance to change floors, walls, colors, decor, everything! I got rid of his presence around the house in the span of couple of months.  But that did not erase the memories.

Today two years later I realized, that I want to erase memories of moments we shared.  I came to that all thanks to Justin Timberlake! I went to JT's concert in Miami, the last time I was at one of this was back in the time when my ex still pretended to be happy.  It was an amazing concert, but I wanted to replace this memory with a new one, one that was only mine, that was lived by this new persona that I am today. 

It just clicked, there are many things we need to leave behind if we truly want to move on.  If  we keep ourselves tied to memories and experiences, we are never going to be truly free, we will always be wondering what happened, why they did not love us anymore, was any of it real... The questions will be never ending.  And certainly you cannot fill up your cup if is still full.

I started creating sort of a 'bucket list' with all the things that I want to re-do, like I did my home two years ago.  I want to travel to all the places we went together, I want to go to new places, I want to watch the World Cup without having to go for the team he goes for... I want to experience live all over again.  It sounds scary and at the same time very exciting.

Let the "exorcism" begin!  That is exactly what you are trying to do, to expel that presence from your life, to make room for your own.  It is scary, but you cannot back up, this process will require you to dare, to venture into the unknown.  My guess is you will either learn or laugh, or probably both.  But do not, I repeat, do not go back. Your life depends on it!

Thru my divorce I discovered I am a teacher, a writer and a loving mother.  I want my story to inspire you and fill you up with hope so you too can get to the other side of the tunnel.


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